Brüste, Küsse und Spionage
by The Queen of Valencia Torgue
Summary: "Who knew field work would be so fun?" Deryn grinned. "It's a far cry from being Emperor," Alek admitted. Deryn laughed. "What's not to like? It's got government intelligence, subterfuge, and me!" Just a fluffy little headcanon-y oneshot that I whipped up. T for the comments of a certain loris. (And the translation of my title.) Enjoy.


**Yo. So I've been a fan of Leviathan since around the time the third book came out, and now I've actually gotten around to writing something fluffy for it. I've got this headcanon where they get married pretty young, but just continue to travel with Dr. Barlow. Alek becomes her primary assistant, and Deryn is basically bodyguard to both of them. If I weren't in college and working two jobs and such, I would totally write it all out. That being said, I would be happy to outline/guide someone in writing that all out, if someone so wished. *Ahem.* **

**Anyway, here is it. 544 words of fluff/action/scandalous lorises. I actually DO own this bit of writing, however the characters are not my own. Enjoy.**

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The woman stumbled on her gown as she entered the room, muttering a curse as she grabbed the door frame for support.

"Deryn! Language!" scolded the man directly behind her, all dressed up for a fancy party.

"Language!" cackled the loris sitting on the man's shoulder.

Deryn hiked up her dress to venture deeper into the room, rolling her eyes at the man and the beastie as she did so. "There's nobody here, Alek. That's why we chose this room to make the swap. Now shut the door and stand guard, won't you?"

Alek shut the door gently, then withdrew his watch from his jacket pocket. "Five minutes, _liebe_."

Deryn did not reply, as she was too busy shedding her dress. Underneath she wore trousers, a sharp waistcoat, and a small arsenal of assorted weaponry. Gathering her long blonde hair back into a leather tie, she asked her escort, "How do I look?"

He smiled, eying her up and down. "Not like you used to on the _Leviathan_."

"Diddies!" Bovril chimed in helpfully.

Deryn colored slightly, but cheekily tossed back to Alek, "Not that you mind, I'd expect."

Her husband flushed red, and Deryn laughed. "Barking spiders, Alek. We're married now. It's perfectly acceptable to be fond of my, um..._assets_."

Ears glowing red, Alek looked down at his watch again. "It's time. Remember, to wait for Dr. Barlow's signal. We'll meet you outside once it's over."

Deryn smiled, walking over to join him by the door. "Aye, I know the drill."

Alek caught her wrist before she could grab the doorknob, pulling her close. "Oh, but you're forgetting something."

A minute later, the door banged open, an irate Dr. Barlow framed within.

Deryn and Alek jumped apart, straightening their clothes and hair and very determinedly not looking her in the eye.

"Snogging," Bovril said matter-of-factly, launching into a round of enthusiastic kissing noises.

Deryn frowned up at it. "Traitor."

"Punctuality is of the essence," Dr. Barlow's loris sniffed.

"Indeed," Dr. Barlow agreed. She stepped to the side of the door. "Now if you two are quite finished, we have a job to do."

She started down the hall, and Alek and Deryn followed after.

"Caught again," Deryn whispered to Alek. "You know, you're not very good at guarding the door."

Alek shrugged. "What can I say? I had the best field agent of the London Zoological Society distracting me."

Deryn grinned, bumping him with her shoulder. "Who knew that field work would be this fun?"

"It's a far cry from being Emperor," Alek admitted.

"Let's see. Government intelligence, subterfuge, and me. What's not to love?"

Alek laughed, and with one last glare from Dr. Barlow, one last peck on the cheek from his trouser-wearing wife, and one sly giggle of "_assets_" from the loris, he walked back though the ball room and headed for the exit. After all, he did have a get-away walker to pilot. And maybe, once Deryn had the papers and Dr. Barlow had disentangled herself from the chaos soon to occur, he and Deryn could get back to what the lady boffin had so rudely interrupted. But this time, they would be sure to leave Bovril out of it.

Perspicacious loris.

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